“Thank you, Number four”
YYYOOOO! What up H3:33 Fam Bam! I’m back with another note from the journey. This time I’m sitting in a Starbucks… waiting for my lady to finish her 90 minute massage, listening to the “Mars Frequency” as all this random energy(high and low) enters and exits the building. I hope that you are all having an amazing week and sitting in a space of appreciation and gratitude. I truly wasn’t even sure what I was going to write about this week as I sat down to start typing this but that last sentence hit the switch. Life is constantly evolving and we can evolve with it. Or choose to remain complacent and wonder why our happiness level is failing to improve. Last week I talked about change so I won’t go down that road again but this topic goes hand in hand with change.
I am going to write this with the POV that whomever is reading this, has also read my 10/01 post…ssoooooo if you did not…be sure to do so, that way all the dots can connect.
Over the last three years dealing with the ebbs and flows of life….has taught many lessons but I think my favorite one is that of appreciation and gratitude. There is a saying that people use often when asked “How are you?”....and that is.. “Can’t complain”...
ME…I am “people” because that used to be the way I looked at life sometimes.
Knowing that things could always be worse….but not truly happy with my life. So saying “can’t complain”....was me wanting to be annoyed/bothered/sad/mad/UNAPPRECIATIVE for situations that were in my control and I did not want to be accountable for.
BUT if someone dug deep enough….I’m sure the complaints would flow out. Which they did once I met someone who truly wanted me to become the best version of myself. She dug deep to uncover what I had hidden.
Hidden so that I could sit in false bravado, and happiness….I had to transform my way of thinking and be open to healing wounds I allowed to be around for the vast majority of my life. Most trauma is directly related to our childhoods….we will remember the bad things that happened and not recall all of the good times.
Not thinking about all of the sacrifices our parents made for us, not remembering that they were their own people before becoming mom and dad, or that they were most likely dealing with their own wounds . I probably should not have used “we” there…because this is about ME and I cannot speak for you, but it is possible it will resonate.
Last week I mentioned resolving a mother wound from childhood. Which is wild because I was blessed with not one mother but TWO! I just chose to look at the negative instead of the positive. Yes, one created that wound but another ROSE TO THE OCCASION, gave up her early 20s to do something I feel like most women would not have done but without that sacrifice…who knows what life looks like for me today. So THANK YOU! Truly!
Currently there are three Hiram’s in my lineage walking the Earth. Before I posted last week, I had a fly conversation with my father about something I mentioned in my initial post. His insight was powerful, right on time, and reminded me how privileged I am to have him in my life. My guy had me when he was 24, gave up his opportunity to be a model, and joined the Air Force.
Now a couple of things…FIRST AND FOREMOST….at 24 I was absolutely not ready for a kid. For REAL….I wasn’t ready at 29 when I had mine. But I did what I knew was required/expected of me as a MAN….which is one of the many things I learned from my father…Which is something he learned from his father….which is something that was learned from his father( another Hiram 😉💪🏿). Lots of other things were passed down but for the point of this post and to keep it from being mad long…..THANK YOU!
Today(10/7) is my grandfather's birthday and I shared with him my post from last week…. and his message back to me was “Proud of you number four. You have great things ahead of you. Love Grandpa”. That message did my heart and soul good but he is another one that I did not appreciate like I should have. Along with my uncle and grandmother(his son and wife) that I lost and would LOVE to have conversations with in my current mindset.
All those words to say….sitting in a space of appreciation and gratitude is one that we should always look for. Of course there could always be something to complain about…but why? Why waste the time/energy to do that…when that same time and energy can be used to pour back into those who poured into you? Or even better yet….to POUR BACK INTO YOU!
Now it is not lost on me that I grew up with a level of privilege that was not afforded to everyone. Having both my father and my grandfather to look to is something that I will never again take for granted. Because I know so many men…Especially Black men….who never had that example. Some never even met their fathers.
Much of my family, for instance, carries wounds I can’t pretend to understand. And while our stories are different, it reminds me that gratitude isn’t about comparison…...it’s about compassion. It’s about recognizing what we’ve been given and using it to pour into others who are still searching for that guidance.
Gratitude changes the way we see everything. It transforms lessons into blessings and turns pain into perspective. Whether it’s the sacrifices made before us or the growth we choose now, appreciation is the bridge that keeps our legacy alive.
Healing builds strength, healing builds legacy.
Check me out next week for another glimpse into the Journey! If this post sparked questions, comments, or reflections. Feel free to comment below, hit me up on IG, or TikTok. I’m always down for a thought-provoking discussion or feedback for growth.
Holla at MMMeeeeeee
Hiram
H3:33