Hiram 11/5/25 Hiram 11/5/25

It’s Not Confrontation…It’s Conversation

AYYYYEEEE What up H3:33 Fam Bam! It’s that time again…..How is everyone? Hard to believe that it is November and that 2025 will be over before we know it. Daylight savings time has hit…. It is dark before 6pm now and sometimes that can impact people negatively. There is no dark without light and life is always about BALANCE. So keep that in mind 😉

As we delve back into another note from the journey….I’d like to talk about the difficulty that can come with having TOUGH conversations. Whether you are the one bringing up the topic or on the receiving end of the conversation. I recently was on the receiving end of a tough conversation because I did not vocalize my emotions properly. I have had to deliver tough conversations because boundaries were crossed, adults were not being accountable for their own actions, or just a typical time on Dad duty.

I have been on the receiving end of many tough conversations that I did not always handle in a productive manner. I’m much better than I used to be…..so let’s talk about it. The other day I was approached by my lady because my energy seemed “off”....she knows me VERY well and since she thought something was wrong….she checked on me to see what was up. Now truthfully..nothing was wrong at all. So when I was asked, I just mentioned “I’m good”. At the moment that is what I thought was the truth but after a day of little to no and/or short communication.

A CONVERSATION was had…..That’s when I realized how quickly misunderstanding can grow when silence fills the space where truth should be.

“Not seeing eye to eye can be fixed with a heart to heart”

Word to my guy Big Sean

Without getting into all of the details, while nothing was truly bothering me, my actual behavior throughout the day was not aligned with how I am when I am “good” . It happened to be a busy day, and typically when I am busy I switch into productive mode……and just like it sounds….I am HIGHLY productive…BUT…in that mode I can also be dismissive. It is not my intention to be rude but if the other person is unaware of this “mode” and when I’m asked if anything is wrong and I say “I’m good” or that “nothing is wrong”......It is easy to understand confusion growing.

It is not CONFRONTATION….It is CONVERSATION…..

Leading with EGO……..in either perspective….the one initiating the tough conversation…..or the one receiving the conversation…..is dangerous. HURT feelings will cause the temperature of the convo to increase rapidly. Whether we are being held accountable or the one holding accountability over another human's head……We have to approach the situation with GRACE and receive with GRACE.

I am a Sagittarius and we are notorious for being very BLUNT…..I have had to learn grace…in multiple aspects of life. Using conversation as an opportunity for growth…is important to remember. It is not about winning or losing….it is about improving ourselves, our relationships and our lives.

Sometimes the HARDEST conversations are the ones that bring the most peace. Speak with grace. Listen with intention. Remember it’s not confrontation, it’s conversation.

Healing builds strength, rising builds legacy.

Check me out next week for another glimpse into the Journey! If this post sparked questions, comments, or reflections. Feel free to comment below, hit me up on IG, or TikTok. I’m always down for a thought-provoking discussion or feedback for growth.

Holla at MMmeeeeeee

Hiram

H3:33

Hiram 10/29/25 Hiram 10/29/25

The Lesson Before The Lesson

YYYOOOOOO!!!! Looks like it’s that time again as I am back with another Note from the Journey. How is everyone? The weather’s shifting, the days are shorter, and the holidays are creeping up. In the middle of all that noise, remember to keep yourself on your own priority list 🙂.

This week’s post came to me on Sunday, after an intense meditation and deep conversation with my llllaady. We were talking and I mentioned how literally every mistake I made in life I was forewarned about at some point in time. The thing about that is….do we take heed to our parents, angels, ancestors, intuition, etc??Or let the ego lead from a place of ignorance? We all have a choice…because there is always a choice….and that is because God gave us FREE WILL!

Looking back, there are countless times in which I was advised one thing and decided to let my ego lead me into a dark abyss. Hahaha not really humorous but I’m gonna share something that is kinda funny.

When I was a child I wasn’t shy about letting it be known how I could NOT WAIT to be “grown”. I remember feeling like this at a young age, I am not sure which exact age but I know that is was one in which I had NO idea what it meant to be grown 😂

If I recall correctly….I don’t believe I was hesitant about sharing this sentiment with those older than me. It did not matter who it was….parents….grandparents….aunties…or uncles…..it was one band one sound. “Boy, Stop” in all different variations …….edited mostly but explicit at times hahaha which was necessary to snap me back into the present moment. I was CONSTANTLY advised to enjoy my childhood, cherish the time and HAVE FUN. Reflecting back…..I can see that nearly every mistake I made could have been avoided if I would've sought counsel or simply LISTENED when I was being blessed with wisdom from an elder.

Being deeper than ever into adulthood I sit back and laugh at “Lil Hiram” wanting BILLS, STRESS, and RESPONSIBILTY. I just KNEW being an adult was LIT hahaha my Dad used to drink brews with his dinner and to me I assumed it tasted like a caramel float or something……Imagine my disappointment LOL

In this moment today…I TRULY enjoy being an adult, but for stretches of time in adultland…..it’s been rough. Which is why all the people I mentioned above tried to steer me into the direction of childhood enjoyment. But…as we can tell from the theme of this post….I did not have a willingness to listen to advice.

My discernment has failed me many times and now as a FATHER…..looking back at how I chose not to listen when I was a child/adolescent/teen/young adult. How do I become the breaker of chains?

I have or know someone who has the key to nearly every door my kids will come across…….but what makes them listen?

Life is about the journey , but it doesn't have to be hard at all times. I saw this quote I liked the other day ….

“If you went back and fixed all the mistakes you’ve ever made..you’d erase yourself”

It’s easy to look back on our tests once we’ve seen the answer key, but wisdom isn’t about hindsight…..it’s about HUMILITY. The willingness to SEEK counsel before we CRASH. The strength to quiet the ego long enough to hear God’s whisper. Guidance is always there; we just have to be willing to listen….

Healing builds strength, rising builds legacy.

Holla at MMmeeeeeee

Hiram

H3:33

Hiram 10/22/25 Hiram 10/22/25

The Mirror Moment

AAAYYYEEE!!! What up H3:33 Fam Bam!! Back again to drop another note from the journey of ME becoming my best self. How are you? I hope you’re sitting in a space of peace,love, and growth….but if you’re not, that’s okay too. Every emotion has a purpose when we face it with honesty.

Soooooo to what ya’ll have come for…..another story from me about a mistake turned into one of the morals of MY story. Last week I mentioned how I decided upon this topic two weeks ago in Starbucks but until right now, I was unsure which story I wanted to share for this entry….but finally decided upon one…..👀

The last three posts were regarding occurrences within the last 3-4 years of my life. This week will be different….as we will journey back nearly a decade… Let me tell you about the time when I thought the problem was “out there” but discovered it was in a much more convenient(or maybe INconvenient) location…….

In March of 2016 I walked into the hospital as a 29 yr old fella and walked out a day or two later as a FATHER. Going into this huge change I knew I was in over my head but it really hit me when it was time to leave the hospital with the babies. I was SO surprised that all the hospital cared about was if I had two properly installed car seats. They did not do a wellness check to see if I was mentally stable, they did not care if I was homeless, or if I had any money. This was the first time in my life that my actions would directly shape someone else’s future…. and here I was..….mad at the hospital for not making sure I was ready to be a father hahaha

ACCOUNTABILITY can be a hard pill to swallow……..

From 2016 til today there have been many lessons on this topic and it was hard for me to pick something more specific because I felt like those were situations better suited for a different category. So I landed on the occurrence that triggered real ACCOUNTABILITY in me…..Now…..a decade ago the growth was in SLOOOWWW motion, but forward progress is progress nonetheless.

Reflecting back on my hospital story….I chuckle to myself because there I was….looking to place blame/fault/responsibility externally. Looking at the “World” to be the biggest source of disappointment, danger, or distractions for my boys…….before checking MYSELF first. Why would the hospital need to make sure I’m fit to be a parent and have the ability to take care of the kids I helped to create? If I knew that I was lacking somewhere….why would I put myself in a position to add more responsibility onto my plate? It’s not impossible that this happens, but that would lead me back to that hard pill to swallow I mentioned earlier….

They say…..and I agree….that we reap what we sow….and I have not always planted fruitfully good seeds in my garden. One day(much sooner than later) those seeds will grow into flowers…some will be full of pain and sorrow…..and others will be full of love and happiness……I’m here for it ALL!

That leads me back to how I said I used to think problems were “out there” but turns out they were in a much more convenient or INconvenient place…..and that is WITHIN MYSELF…..

Accountability is about looking into that mirror….staring back at the person you see….and deciding whether or not….that person is truly who YOU want to be….

There came a time in which I could not stand….the person I would see looking back at me. So I had to CHANGE…..what I could CONTROL….so that I would become a man I APPRECIATE. See how I brought that full circle(if not…check out the first 3 posts)…😉

The mirror doesn't lie….but it can teach. Every time we face it with HONESTY, we choose growth over guilt. And that’s where real freedom begins. So take another look….

Healing builds strength, rising builds legacy.

Holla at MMmeeeeeee

Hiram

H3:33

Hiram 10/15/25 Hiram 10/15/25

“not my sink. not my dishes.”

Control is an illusion...but growth is real. In this week's Note from the Journey, Hiram shares a raw story about facing his own triggers, releasing control, and trusting God's plan. From dream to reality, he breaks down what it means to truly "control the controllable" and let peace do the work.

YOOOO!! What up H3:33 Fam Bam! Back again with ya’ll for another note from the journey 😁. I hope that as you are reading this you are sitting in a space of peace, love, happiness, and gratitude. If not…just know that things WILL get better. Life is about balance and there is no dark without LIGHT.

Last week when I was writing my entry for ya’ll…I actually determined what my next two topics were going to be. Which is not how the first two topics came to fruition because I like to write whatever it is I feel in my soul at the time. Lowkey I am happy I did it differently this week because this post will be dropping in a few hours and if I did not know what I wanted to write about…..it’s likely I’d be SCRAMBLING right now trying to figure out a topic hahaha but everything works out exactly how it is supposed to….EVERY…time.

So…..I got a story to tell…well…a LOT of em but this one is about a situation that happened two weeks ago. And it just so happens that a few days prior to this event I had a dream about an interaction that hadn’t happened….now the old me would have just assumed it was “odd”(I have more feels about dreams but that’s a different topic for a different day) but in the space I currently reside….I knew this was a message. I shared the details of this dream with one person before said event. Her and I discussed this dream, why I had it, what it meant and my plan going forward….

After that conversation I was feeling GOOD, prepared and ready for life’s next test. Or so I thought….because….the EXACT….and I mean EXACT situation from the dream showed up on my doorstep. Here was the chance to ignore old triggers, rise above, and build the reality that I want to live. INSTEAD the story has a twist because…….I had ish to GET OFF MY CHEST! I didn’t go 0-100 like I would have in the past…it was more like 0-60… unnecessary nonetheless. I almost typed “out of character” instead of “unnecessary” but it happened so it was obviously still a PART of me. What this incident did was shine a light on an issue I thought I had truly worked on……CONTROL…..

“Sometimes you just gotta shut the F*!$ up”

A great, honest, direct, corrective and NECESSARY….statement that was presented to me shortly after my dream became my reality. Why did I deviate from the plan I had already created? Why did I let something trigger me that I was divinely prepared for?

The answer is/was simple….I still had control issues that I had not yet fully released. I often try to fix problems that have NOTHING to do with/are outside of me 🤦🏿‍♂️. “Not my sink not my dishes” “Control the controllable” …two quotes I like and would use if/when I felt myself slipping into the fear of losing control…..yet…when I had the chance to prove to myself and others who are convinced that I am still the version of me they knew YEARS ago…..I returned to what was comfortable for me….while making things uncomfortable for others.

“Sometimes you just have to shut the F!$# Up”

Control issues are often rooted in trauma that was created by an incident that made us feel victimized/embarrassed/hurt etc..and we vow to never let it happen again. Set the expectation within thyself to control everything we can in hopes to protect ourselves. Not allowing people to help us…..EVEN when it is obvious that we need help….because we want it done a certain way or have a lack of trust in an external energy.

How do we learn to release control? For me, control has always felt like protection….a way to keep chaos away. But the truth is, control is often fear in disguise. Fear that things won’t go right unless I’m steering every move. Fear that if I don’t handle it, it won’t get handled. But healing taught me something new: sometimes the lesson isn’t in the steering, it’s in surrendering.

Being a father made that lesson hit harder. I can guide my sons, but I can’t control their journey. I can show them love, but I can’t choose their lessons. What I can control is my response, my peace, and my presence.

So this week, I remind myself….and EVERYONE reading this….to control the controllable and release the rest. Trust that God already has the plan in motion.

Healing builds strength, rising builds legacy.

Check me out next week for another glimpse into the Journey. If this post sparked something in you, or you’ve struggled with control yourself, leave a comment below, on IG or TikTok. Let’s grow together!

Holla at mmmmeeeeee!

Hiram

H3:33

Hiram 10/8/25 Hiram 10/8/25

“Thank you, Number four”

YYYOOOO! What up H3:33 Fam Bam! I’m back with another note from the journey. This time I’m sitting in a Starbucks… waiting for my lady to finish her 90 minute massage, listening to the “Mars Frequency” as all this random energy(high and low) enters and exits the building. I hope that you are all having an amazing week and sitting in a space of appreciation and gratitude. I truly wasn’t even sure what I was going to write about this week as I sat down to start typing this but that last sentence hit the switch. Life is constantly evolving and we can evolve with it. Or choose to remain complacent and wonder why our happiness level is failing to improve. Last week I talked about change so I won’t go down that road again but this topic goes hand in hand with change.

I am going to write this with the POV that whomever is reading this, has also read my 10/01 post…ssoooooo if you did not…be sure to do so, that way all the dots can connect.

Over the last three years dealing with the ebbs and flows of life….has taught many lessons but I think my favorite one is that of appreciation and gratitude. There is a saying that people use often when asked “How are you?”....and that is.. “Can’t complain”...

ME…I am “people” because that used to be the way I looked at life sometimes.

Knowing that things could always be worse….but not truly happy with my life. So saying “can’t complain”....was me wanting to be annoyed/bothered/sad/mad/UNAPPRECIATIVE for situations that were in my control and I did not want to be accountable for.

BUT if someone dug deep enough….I’m sure the complaints would flow out. Which they did once I met someone who truly wanted me to become the best version of myself. She dug deep to uncover what I had hidden.

Hidden so that I could sit in false bravado, and happiness….I had to transform my way of thinking and be open to healing wounds I allowed to be around for the vast majority of my life. Most trauma is directly related to our childhoods….we will remember the bad things that happened and not recall all of the good times.

Not thinking about all of the sacrifices our parents made for us, not remembering that they were their own people before becoming mom and dad, or that they were most likely dealing with their own wounds . I probably should not have used “we” there…because this is about ME and I cannot speak for you, but it is possible it will resonate.

Last week I mentioned resolving a mother wound from childhood. Which is wild because I was blessed with not one mother but TWO! I just chose to look at the negative instead of the positive. Yes, one created that wound but another ROSE TO THE OCCASION, gave up her early 20s to do something I feel like most women would not have done but without that sacrifice…who knows what life looks like for me today. So THANK YOU! Truly!

Currently there are three Hiram’s in my lineage walking the Earth. Before I posted last week, I had a fly conversation with my father about something I mentioned in my initial post. His insight was powerful, right on time, and reminded me how privileged I am to have him in my life. My guy had me when he was 24, gave up his opportunity to be a model, and joined the Air Force.

Now a couple of things…FIRST AND FOREMOST….at 24 I was absolutely not ready for a kid. For REAL….I wasn’t ready at 29 when I had mine. But I did what I knew was required/expected of me as a MAN….which is one of the many things I learned from my father…Which is something he learned from his father….which is something that was learned from his father( another Hiram 😉💪🏿). Lots of other things were passed down but for the point of this post and to keep it from being mad long…..THANK YOU!

Today(10/7) is my grandfather's birthday and I shared with him my post from last week…. and his message back to me was “Proud of you number four. You have great things ahead of you. Love Grandpa”. That message did my heart and soul good but he is another one that I did not appreciate like I should have. Along with my uncle and grandmother(his son and wife) that I lost and would LOVE to have conversations with in my current mindset.

All those words to say….sitting in a space of appreciation and gratitude is one that we should always look for. Of course there could always be something to complain about…but why? Why waste the time/energy to do that…when that same time and energy can be used to pour back into those who poured into you? Or even better yet….to POUR BACK INTO YOU!

Now it is not lost on me that I grew up with a level of privilege that was not afforded to everyone. Having both my father and my grandfather to look to is something that I will never again take for granted. Because I know so many men…Especially Black men….who never had that example. Some never even met their fathers.

Much of my family, for instance, carries wounds I can’t pretend to understand. And while our stories are different, it reminds me that gratitude isn’t about comparison…...it’s about compassion. It’s about recognizing what we’ve been given and using it to pour into others who are still searching for that guidance.

Gratitude changes the way we see everything. It transforms lessons into blessings and turns pain into perspective. Whether it’s the sacrifices made before us or the growth we choose now, appreciation is the bridge that keeps our legacy alive.

Healing builds strength, healing builds legacy.

Holla at MMMeeeeeee

Hiram

H3:33

Hiram 10/1/25 Hiram 10/1/25

when change chooses you

When change chooses you, how do you respond? In the first installment of H3:33 - Notes from the Journey, Hiram shares raw lessons on navigating life’s challenges, embracing transformation, and turning discomfort into growth. Discover why healing builds strength and rising builds legacy.

What up H3:33 Fam Bam! Welcome to the first installment of my blog. This has been a long time coming and quite frankly is well overdue. I have been terribly inconsistent with my social media presence for H3:33 because I truly do not enjoy social media nor making content. Regardless of that, I have the framework for a book, feelings, insight, wisdom, and a desire to connect with those who resonate with my message. I know that means many will not want to read this for various reasons and I am completely at peace with that. Everyone is here for a specific reason and has their own path to follow and tests to pass. Sending positive energy and love to all.

My journey to the Hiram of today, sitting here typing to you at my dining room table while my kids are in school has been a tumultuous one. Without even going back too far, I will talk about all of the changes I have experienced since moving to my current place of residence(~3 years)…..

Started a new position at Verizon
Took over full time parental duties of my sons
I found a best friend who became the love of my life, my inspiration, and one to check me when I’m TRIPPIN (which used to happen MUCH more than it happens now…..THANKS BABY!)
My favorite Uncle became an ancestor
My last remaining grandmother joined her son as an ancestor
My 2nd favorite Uncle joined the ancestral realm
I forced a Co-parental change rooted from an NOW RESOLVED mother trauma wound
I lost the same (what some would call a very lucrative) job I mentioned up top
Started Hiram’s Holistic Healing
Currently contemplating yet another co-parental change

MMMAAAAAN!! It's been a time….and I’m sure there are things that I have possibly forgotten but those are the heavy hitters. I shared these moments to talk CHANGE…..voluntary and involuntary.

One of my favorite doctors likes to say “people only change when they are uncomfortable” and if we look at the current situation this country is in……many people are UNcomfortable. So how do we handle it?

Change isn't easy…it stretches us in ways we never asked for. Sometimes it feels like we’re being dragged through fire, and other times it feels like stepping into new air we’re not sure how to breathe. The challenge is real. Fear of the unknown, losing what’s familiar, and letting go of who we thought we were can shake us to our core. But here’s the thing…those exact struggles are the soil where the growth is planted. Without discomfort, there's no strength. Without loss, there's no gratitude. Without endings, there can be no beginnings.

When I look back, I see that every uncomfortable shift carried a hidden gift. The pain of losing loved ones made me cherish life more deeply. The job I lost cleared space for me to walk in my purpose. The battles in co-parenting forced me to heal old wounds. Change has been both my teacher and my test. And whether we choose it or it chooses us, one truth remains: change is not against us…it is for us. The question we must ask ourselves is not “Will change come?” but “How will I grow through it?”

Check me out next week for another glimpse into the Journey! If this post sparked questions, comments, or even challenges…

Healing builds strength, rising builds legacy.

Feel free to leave a comment below, reach out on IG, TikTok, or my contact me page above . I’m always open to thought-provoking conversations and feedback for growth.

Holla at mmmmeeeeee!

Hiram

H3:33